black friday.

few days ago, my mobile phone SMS inbox is near to its limit, so i just roughly delete some of the stored SMSes. I thought i never need the Digi insurance anymore, i discarded the message. slowly, things are coming to haunt me. Was that a lucky charm for me? i dont know.

on my way to Wangsa maju for weekly gamers meeting, i saw a few road accidents. 3 if i'm not mistaken. glasses and components are shattered on the floor. and, i never thought that this would happen to me 7 hours later. i still remember foongie did invite me for a yum cha session, which i was so regretted to go to Wangsa Maju. i wanted to see her for so looong.

i was @ tbun Wangsa Maju from 10 to 3. Then, i drive sis's car back to damansara perdana. I still remember vividly how i created a new playlist and burn it into a disc, so i can listen to it while im driving to and fro. to my amazement, there werent a lot of cars on the road this early morning.

stroke's songs gave me the mood to reach home earlier. i didnt speed either, i know the car's limit. and i come up to the bridge which is still under construction near KPMG tower. light was green, music was going strong, speed was okay, the car was moving towards the right direction. Out of nowhere, there's this WJH 5115 kia spectra came from SS2 direction which leaves me no time to respond. Even hitting the brake hard couldnt help either, i bumped onto her car. The driver was a 3X malay lady who gave me the reason she did not know which traffic light she supposed to refer to.

i'm grateful that there was this malay couple who was following behind my car helped me. They clearly supported me saying that it was our turn, not that reckless driver. This is my first time dealing with car accident, certainly i would not know what to do, besides, i was so shocked. it was them who helped me, they told me everything i need to do. Thank you, the couple of BKA 121, perodua Viva.

Thinking back, i did not know how i could be so calm and not angry @ that moment.

Furthermore, i couldnt contact my sister or bro in law. i tried and i tried, to no avail. the towman told me to come back home and wait til they wake up, and i did just that. from 4.40 to 7, i never relax myself. i was lying on the bed watching the ceiling, didnt know how i should feel anymore. i lost my direction @ that moment, knowing that i've caused so much troubles and problems to my family. ive been trying to make them less worry about me, i did the exact opposite this morning.

i blame myself, i blame my luck, i blame that idiotic reckless useless brainless scum. i wouldnt be this upset if it's my car and not sis's. i really dont like to break others' items, especially expensive ones. i'm guilt-ridden. argh! a depressed person like me currently needs some anti-depressant, desserts.

i should be grateful that nothing major had happened to me. else, you wont be seeing this now. i know i have a strong spirit to continue living, i know i should not leave my beloveds before they leave me, this will be so unfair. but after all of this, do i still know til when i will keep on breathing? i do not know anymore. Human lives are so weak.

Mars.

"When you give me k-kisses...that's money honey..."
The voice of Lady GaGa faded in and echo-ed in the air. This is undeniably a great alarm to wake me up every morning, first thing i'd do would be turn it off and lie back down for another minute or two. Then, Dragging myself to the bathroom, out of the bathroom, into the kitchen, out of the kitchen, to the dining room, had my dinner, changed to formal wear, apply some facial care, use some perfume and off i go to work.

the thing is my work starts @ 9 and i often reach office @ 8.10am. you must be wondering why would i not leave the house @ 8.40am. Cant Do That! this is due to that i must follow sis out or else i have to think of a way to get to the office. that wont be nice, isnt it.

if you have 50 minutes to spare, what would you do? previously, i'd start my work asap. then i realize, why stress myself so much? 1 should start slow in the early morning. Yeah Yeah Yeahs and Strokes albums are great morning albums, they give me the mood to kick start my work. What's best is playing pinball while listening to the albums. The drums are just like the sound effects meant for that metallic ball. just great!

and yeaahh.. things are little different today. I never took out my X-FI player, i never played pinball. i read, instead.
embarked on a journey to Mars and Venus. Surely, you know what book i am reading right now aite.

and i'm so grateful that i was reading it alone in the office today. I laughed out so loud that people will think that im crazy. Wait, i'm crazy afterall. The first chapter is interesting already! Honest, Straight and Direct. The first it discussed about is Men and Women conversation needs.

you see, the book uses examples. The examples really resemble real life situations. and i do think the examples are real too.
First lesson. what women want in a conversation is not solutions, but a pair of ears. Just some caring words, gestures and a pair of ears are sufficient. A hug is inevitable too. but, what most men would do is make suggestions and solutions to solve a particular problem. Men are born as repairman. They tend to repair things, to be successful, to be a pro. But, women dont really need that, and now i gotta agree with this, hands up, legs up. Whatever you (guys) do, just support her, hold her up! or .. hug her tightly would do i guess, they just want you to listen, that's it.

and what men want is not solution, but you, women, to keep quiet. Women that give suggestions and solutions thought that they can help their beloved to further improve, to be a better man. However, their actions would hurt their men more. It damages the self-esteem and confidence of a man. Men would think that they are useless and unable to bring happiness you all want. trust me, we do really feel this way. So, the next time, when your bf/husband got lost on their way to a certain place, just keep quiet. when they are about to screw up, let them be. trust them girls!

so what you waiting there, if you have a girlfriend, go hug her tightly now!
you gotta pity me, i only have a bolster.

they are back!